Thank You

Tonight, I would just like to take the time to acknowledge the services (or lack thereof) of a few groups of people. First of all, I would like to thank custodial and the Bob Jones design team for the beautiful job they have done and continue to do on the Fine Arts bathroom floors. They are a soothing pattern, and they are relatively clean and shiny. They are cool to the touch, which is a good thing when you find yourself curled up in the fetal position for an hour and a half. ^_^ Also, I would like to thank the many young women who passed through the second floor bathroom today and gave plenty of space and silence to the girl in the corner. I'm sure they were too concerned they would break my concentration to come and ask if I were in need of assistance. There was one girl, however, who did venture to inquire as to my current state. Having done her good deed and hearing my answer of, "Ibuprofen......please..." she hurried off to her next class. I'm sure an extremely pale, sweaty, shivering female scrunched on the bathroom floor probably doesn't look like a warm and fuzzy interaction, but there was one girl who eventually heard me and went to get a GA. This GA was so nice! She managed to get some water, ibuprofen (which I couldn't take as I had managed to relocate myself by a great porcelain throne from nausea caused by pain), and supervision while I lay there. In the pauses between my stomach trying to tear itself apart, I managed to find out her name and a bit about herself. I even cracked a joke! :-D Eventually the pain subsided enough for me to relocate once again to the sofa in her office where I was VERY thankful for a comfy couch and a nice fleecy blanket to sleep off the rest of this "episode". At around 11:40, she woke me up and told me the time. I managed to apologize and thank her then headed off to my next class. No one should miss History of Civ. lecture! Next, I am thankful for my group of friends in the Snack Shop who unknowingly provided me with some much needed sustenance of half of a nutella and peanut butter bagel. With the use of one of their laptops, I was able to complete my English homework in time for the tutorial that followed my break. A nap seemed good, and I am so very thankful for the inventor of the alarm clock. It woke me up to tell me it was time for work. I arrived two hours late, however, but I am thankful for an amazing and supportive department who helped me make amends. God bless the crickets...^_^ He painted the sky wonderfully today. It was filled with all sorts of puffy clouds in varying shades of white and grey. Thank God for beautiful music, humour, and the ability to learn. Thank God for the ability to walk and talk without pain. Praise Him for making me a female even if it seems unfortunate at the time. ;-) PRAISE GOD! *_*

*~FUR~*
Proverbs 31:30

"I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvellous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well."     -Psalm 139:14 <3

"I'll Love You Forever!"

I'm a girl.

No really...I am. Why are you laughing...? Think about it. I say this, because sometimes I do stupid girl things, and then I write about it on my blog. :-P I was wondering today if any of you (the people who actually read this) have ever been in an abusive relationship. Before you answer, though, I would like to point out that you can be verbally, mentally, and emotionally abused as well as physically. Have you ever found yourself in a relationship (whether it be romantic, friendly, or familial [man I hope that's a real word...]) where you give every bit of strength you have to remain loyal, helpful, and amusing, yet problem after problem arose where you were the bad guy and the other the victim? Why is it that some people attach themselves so strongly to everyone, even when they know that they will never receive even close to the amount of "love" they have given? For so long, I have wondered if they were wrong to do this, or if it is "just the way they are". Let me post two passages that always seem to give me a hard time whenever I think this way. The one in Proverbs is contextually referring to the "forbidden woman", but verses ten and eleven seem to be applicable to more than that. Please, tell me if I'm erring there.

Proverbs 5:7-17

"And now, O sons, listen to me, and do not depart from the words of my mouth. Keep your way far from her, and do not go near the door of her house, lest you give your honor to others and your years to the merciless, lest strangers take their fill of your strength, and your labors go to the house of a foreigner, and at the end of your life you groan, when your flesh and body are consumed, and you say, "How I hated discipline, and my heart despised reproof! I did not listen to the voice of my teachers or incline my ear to my instructors. I am at the brink of utter ruin in the assembled congregation." Drink water from your own cistern, flowing water from your own well. Should your springs be scattered abroad, streams of water in the streets? Let them be for yourself alone, and not for strangers with you."

This is talking more about a marital thing, but does it not also apply to the emotions and mentality that go along with it? I know for a fact that you can be married to someone all but physically. It's been proven to me. This seems to suggest to me that there is a point at which you stop giving. I am confused at this, however. Where is that point? If someone treats you wrongly, the common attitude today is one of "Oh, let it go. If they are going to treat me badly, I'm not going to stick around. I don't care any more." I agree with the not sticking around part, but aren't we to still care? Maybe I'm confused about the different types of love? It seems to me, however, that if you love your neighbor as yourself, there shouldn't be much of a difference between the self-denying love in a marriage and the self-sacrificing love in a friend. Is there ever a point where we are not to love or SHOW love to someone?? This brings up another passage in my mind.

I Corinthians 13:1-8a

"Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love. I am a noisy gong, or a clanging cymbal. And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing.***Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; It does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love BEARS all things, BELIEVES all things, HOPES all things, ENDURES all things. LOVE NEVER ENDS.***

Half the people I've talked to say it is wrong to wear your heart on your sleeve, and that one must have discretion. I believe they are right about discretion, but I cannot stand "fakeness". Why can't someone "wear their heart on their sleeve?" I don't mean going around constantly yapping about what you believe (Proverbs calls that a fool). I mean when interacting with people, telling them the truth. Not saying everything can be good sometimes, but asking a question you don't genuinely want the answer to, or pretending to be interested in someone when you're not really bugs me. If you have any answers or insight to this rambling post, please post them. It would be greatly appreciated!! Sorry for the length. ^_^

*~FUR~*

Proverbs 31:30

"Owe no man any thing, but to love one another: for he that loveth another hath fulfilled the law."

-Romans 13:8

I'm Hungry!

Everyone has those days where you wake up late, have to rush off without breakfast and start working. Everyone has those days where your work completely swallows you up and makes lunch impossible. Everyone has those days, so everyone should understand how hungry a person can get. They're not starving, granted, but they're pretty stinkin' hungry! Today was one of those days. My thanks goes out to Miss Random Personne who handed me a Nutri-Grain bar to me in eight o'clock General Psychology class. Supper isn't for another hour, and I am having to resist the urge to maliciously decapitate all of Jamie's teddy grahams. <_< This got me thinking, and I was scared to catch myself having a "Sunshine on the Soapsuds" moment.

Everyone has those days where you wake up late and have to rush off without reading their Bible. Everyone has those days where your work completely swallows you up and makes a quiet moment of prayer impossible. Everyone has those days, but many don't understand why they're spiritually malnourished. Many people don't even know how to read the signs.

Honestly, college scared me. It scared me, because I was afraid of failure. Disappointing people will probably always be my biggest fear, and you can ask me why off of here if you would like. It wasn't lack of preparation for the classes that stumped me here, however. Mainly the difficulty has been a social one. Not having anything to say tends to shut down conversations quickly. Having a nuetral countenance tends to bore those of normal teenage attention spans. This led me to wonder what my problem was. On one hand, I know that I'm different than anyone else. On the other, was I really lacking joy? Am I missing something? Guess what I remembered...with all of the worrying, scurrying, etc, I had been reading my Bible, but I had not spent enough time with God. It's so easy to read the bible as a textbook and forget that it's talking about a living, breathing God. He's done so much for me just this past month. He's provided funds, friends, food, and family, yet I still take him for granted. I was still worrying. I was checking off the "to-do" list I was reading every night without talking to and learning from the One who made it. He is patient. He is gracious. He is merciful. He is kind. He knows what lies ahead, and will give me the strength to accomplish the tasks He's given me. Spiritual food isn't just reading and making mental notes. That's like only drinking water every day. We need more. Pray that the Lord will fill me up and nourish my weak spirit, please.

It's always encouraging to hear from others. Feel free to tell me what God's been doing in your life. Post something so that God may be glorified among more people. ^_^

*~FUR~*
Proverbs 31:30



Let love be without dissimulation. Abhor that which is evil; cleave to that which is good. Be kindly affectioned one to another with brotherly love; in honour preferring one another; Not slothful in business; fervent in spirit; serving the Lord; Rejoicing in hope; patient in tribulation; continuing instant in prayer; Distributing to the necessity of saints; given to hospitality. Bless them which persecute you: bless, and curse not. Rejoice with them that do rejoice, and weep with them that weep. Be of the same mind one toward another. Mind not high things, but condescend to men of low estate. Be not wise in your own conceits. Recompense to no man evil for evil. Provide things honest in the sight of all men. If it be possible, as much as lieth in you, live peaceably with all men. Dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves, but rather give place unto wrath: for it is written, Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord. Therefore if thine enemy hunger, feed him; if he thirst, give him drink: for in so doing thou shalt heap coals of fire on his head. Be not overcome of evil, but overcome evil with good."

Providence in Patience

When waiting for college to start, I've found it incredibly frustrating to just sit around. Keeping busy is always helpful and allows less time for worrying about the millions of things that [possibly] could go wrong. This is the main reason I decided to go on a youth trip with my church to West Virginia. The only people remotely close to my age were a guy named Gage and a girl named Ali. We had tons of fun, and little opportunities to help out kept coming up just when I found myself not having anything to do. It was encouraging when I found that the youth group we were to spend a day with was made up of kids my age! God knows exactly how we feel every second of the day. Better...He knows how we WILL feel before we even come into the situation!

After a great trip, we stopped by a Burger King on the way home. Ali and I weren't really in the mood for a fast food burger, so we hiked up to the nearest Bojangles. The walk stretched out the kinks in our legs and backs that we got from being crammed into bus seats, and the pungent odour of cajun fried chicken greeted our noses. We were waiting for our food when a random black lady walked up to me and asked if I truly believed what my shirt said. I hadn't really given much thought to my "Be Real, Stay Pure" t-shirt with the "Blessed are the pure in heart" verse printed on the back. She asked again, and I answered that I did indeed. Her face lit up, and she said, "Then you're my sister! Come here, girl!" She proceeded to give me a hug, and we talked for a minute about how young people today are often too ashamed to proclaim the message of Christ. She saw Ali and asked her if she "knew Him". She answered that she did and was given a hug as well. A few more minutes of talking allowed us to hear about the church that she attended. Ali and I picked up our food and walked back to our group with smiles on our faces and excitement in our hearts.

I'm very sorry we were just passing through. The lady had invited us to a homecoming at her church, but we had to decline. If she was just a reflection of her entire church family, that would easily have been one of the most beautiful events I had attended. God knew I was wondering what it was like to be surrounded by fellow Christians who were excited and growing. He knew that I wanted to see if anyone outside of my little Anderson/Greenville bubble knew Him and counted every redeemed person as family and every lost person as a potential family member. You may call me dramatic, but I don't really care. He sent a sister from another "world" entirely across my path which had never happened before, and THAT is exciting!!!

Whispers of a tri-county Bible study during the upcoming school year, schemes for complete involvement in society activities, anticipations for a new life of work and study and an unhindered healthy lifestyle, and hopes of learning new life skills definitely make life seem to move at a slower pace. Add the element of not knowing where the support will come from to the mix, and you have the perfect picture of a person jogging up a narrow hill next to a very slippery slope of worry and depression...at least in my head. ;-p That's probably normal, though. I'm thinking I'm very close to another paradigm shift. You know what I'm talking about, right? Those moments where everything you thought you knew is suddenly and irreversibly seen in a new light, and it leaves you feeling sick until you get used to it...? It really makes you appreciate the old picture of a person holding onto God in the "storms" of life. They may not even be trials, but if your entire world shifts from under your feet, He truly is the only thing that remains unmoved. Little instances of His providence in my attempts at patient waiting remind me of that. ^_^

*~FUR~*
Proverbs 31:30

p.s. Thank you for your prayers! I'll let you know something...I have a thing for educated and upscale black men. If you didn't know that by now, then you must not know me very well. ;-) I hope you enjoy that feeling of humour and speechlessness you just had. Glad I could add a little "interestingness" to your day.

On Thrift and Necessity

"Go pick out what you need, but remember...BE CONSERVATIVE" said the woman to her daughter as they entered the local Wal-Mart. Mrs. wandered off, leaving Girl alone with her newspaper that was full of circled dorm items. About a half hour of shopping produced a cart with the following items:

-a bathroom towel/wascloth set of six pieces ($8)

-eighteen lime green plastic hangers ($1.50)

-three bowls ($2)

-four plates ($4)

-a floor lamp ($9)

-a bed set ($20) of

• one flat sheet
• one fitted sheet
• one comforter
• two shams
• two pillowcases 
• one duffel bag

 -a three-drawer tower ($15)

-a fluffy purple blanket ($15) just for fun!

Girl returned to Mrs. with thirty dollars in her pocket and hopes of not having to use it all. She was too optimistic. In the end, the hangers and blanket were removed. Only after ten minutes of questioning looks and hard discussion were the towels and tower allowed to remain. Once they had settled on a suitable division of payment, Mrs. commented that she would go get ice cream and meet Girl at the register. Watching marshmallows, corn dogs, popsicles, Cheez-Its, and forty-eight cans of Diet Coke go down the conveyor belt made Girl somewhat hungry, but she didn't mind. She was getting new stuff!!!! ^_^ Orange Dreamsicles don't keep you warm in the winter, but on a hot summer day, Girl didn't mind too much. 

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OH BOY! A SATIRE! :-D How exciting! 

Someone told me my last post was an epic fail, and I apologize. :) Blame Target for not keeping someone's online shopping cart open. I am thrilled to be able to room with one of my best friends since kindergarten. God has provided both my mother and me with jobs, and school cannot come soon enough! A clean slate in a somewhat new place is very welcome. If you feel like praying about it, could you please pray that God will protect me from shadows of the past? They are particularly strong in Greenville. Everyone has things they struggle with, and mine are mostly mental situations such as attitude and emotion. My last post asked for wishlists. On this post, I would love to hear how God is working in your life! He provides every need... and many times even more than we need. I know this. Do you have a story to share?

*~FUR~*

Proverbs 31:30

**Wish*Upon*a*Star**

So everyone has a wish list. Mines just happens to be slightly nerdier. ;-P 

College Version:  http://www.target.com/gp/cart/view.html/ref=nav_sc/178-7828870-7752116

I get to room with a girl who's been in my class since nursery at the Oak, and we dreamed of going all out with twinkle lights, paper lanterns, fuzzy rugs and pillows, and stylish sheets, but that's just what they are...dreams. :) We're going to sit around our hotpot and be completely happy, but sharing dreams is fun, so I'm posting access to a wishlist!! Here's some background information to help you envision this with us. :-P

Jamie's the kind of girl who like wearing bright purple or zebra print high heels. Her hair could outshine Barbie's (no joke!), and she loves the color purple in anything new and trendy. She has a great fashion sense, and can actually pull it off. She's a sports person, but she can chill and listen to music as well. She's just awesome like that. ;-)

I'm a complete nerd, so I adore capybaras, rubber duckies, paper lanterns, music, video games, classical books, and being neat and organized. My favourite color is black, and I LOVE that swirly black and white pattern that is so popular right now. I guess people finally got the clue that it was cool! Hahaha.

No one really posts replies on this here BLOG, but I'm requesting you too. I love looking at other people's lists, so POST YOUR OWN as a reply!! ^_^ Please. If you know me at all...you KNOW that I go absolutely crazy over people's birthdays. Have a wonderful day, and remember that it's completely fine to dream. God's all-sufficient, though. 

*~FUR~*

Proverbs 31:30

Psalm 19:14

Hello Again, World ^_^

Hey, you. Yes, you! The one in front of the screen reading this post. CONGRATULATIONS for taking the time to enlarge your mind by actually reading something. ^_^ That makes me smile! I was just wondering...do you know what it's like to go on a trip of some sort and get completely lost so that time appears to stand still? I went to Washington state to spend some time with my family, and I forgot I owned a dog by the end of the visit...yes...it was that bad. It is amazing what three weeks away from chaos can do for your mind. With all of the craziness of the past few years clogging up my head, I had forgotten who I was. YES I know that's incredibly cliche and corny, but it's true. I didn't know what I liked and disliked. All I could remember were memories of what this person liked and what this other person did when they found out. **breathe** I remembered that I did have a favourite cousin. :P I remembered that I absolutely LOVE video games, coloring, legos, books, Saturday morning cartoons, baking, and actually getting out and laughing with new people! I had forgotten all of that, and it had been replaced with long nights just sitting in front of the t.v. and telling my dog to be quiet.

It's easy to learn how to serve other people. It's much harder to take the initiative and go out of your way to find things to do. It's even more of a challenge to stand in someone's shadows and nod and smile at the appropriate time...waiting for your chance to do something by yourself. Being in a church made of old people...you tend to forget that new believer's excitement more quickly than a growing church (or maybe that's just me). A few nights in a younger church was so encouraging. I do forget why I'm living sometimes, and talking to fellow believers who are learning stuff for the first time and zealous can remind you of the One who loves you unconditionally. It is so encouraging to lift your voice in song with a sanctuary filled with sold-out Christians. Don't get me wrong...spending a few precious hours in a back room with an out of tune piano and a hymnal is a wonderful way to spend time with God. ;-) There's something about true fellowship, however.

Coming home to hear the constant  complaints about how fat people think they are, arguments over which reality tv show guy should win the girl, giggling about the latest teen icon, and gossip about the mistakes of fellow human beings was somewhat disappointing, and I found myself missing Washington terribly, but I suppose those things are common everywhere now. It's funny...God never has to clear His head of anything. He is all-knowing and holy and is SO FAR above all of the human obsessions! Would you like to know what else I had forgotten? I had forgotten that I am longing to work my hardest in and out of the classroom in college, because developing the skills God's given me for His glory is a heart goal. I had forgotten that God's been SOOOO good to me in even allowing me to GO to college! He has provided all of my needs, and even allowed my biggest dream to come true (a visit from my sister without a giant blow-up). He has given me friends when I most needed them, and even in reading my classical books, His Word echoes in my mind, telling me what is of the world, and what is not. It may sound funny, but this is my blog, so :-P!!!!!!!!! Have an amazing day, and GO READ MORE STUFF, smart person! 8-B

*~FUR~*
Proverbs 31:30
Psalm 19:14
p.s. my next post will basically be a wishlist, because I am a selfish person, and I would only tell people what I want when they don't read it. ^_^